RANT 3 ( MY DREAM JOB IS TO BE HELPFUL)

ASL <3

(American Sign Language)

First of i am going to be honest i have had at least 25 ideas or dream jobs i kept changing my mind but i think that the beauty of being young 

all my first ideas were like to be famous like a singer (my voice is pretty okay) actress things like that, then i got a little more real world and wanted to stick to my love of music and decided that radio hosting would be for me but slacked in school, then decided maybe id go for paralegal that one lasted a while but luckily i am a procrastinator 

then i started to dwell on life,was really upset id probably end up doing a job i hated for the rest of my life just to make that paper 

Worked for call centers moved up hated though i can ever do a job i know is being dishonest i hate that i believe in karma so it really bothered me , 

then i did more call center work just not sales but still i was bored i cant be bored! 

so finally i saw the light and i saw the reality of having to go to school if you wanna do more than have a job your "okay" with i look at a couple options...

i thought of dental assisting but just cause i could of gotten it free
(people take advantage of state programs that offer to help!!)

but then i realized i didn't wanna do that either, then i started taking my math classes and all that to see where i am at which is currently just a month ago and i realize maybe surgical tech would be cool pay is awesome, and high in demand made sense plus my cousin wanted to and i like having someone by my side but one day in my math class this kid was talking to me about ASL classes he was going to be doing his excitement of studying it made me interested! its hard work but kinda easy to grab if you pay lots of attention, i am currently doing online studying to get a little ahead classes don't start till January so i have time but so far i have learned lost of sentences and sayings..

its interesting to learn if you watch the show "Switched At Birth you've seen the struggles people go through and how many people don't know sign language to assist

it kinda makes me happy to know I'll be able to help also my mother boyfriends family is all deaf this way i can assist my mom develop a bond with his family its all starting to fit and i think this actually what i have been looking for and will enjoy!

my dream job is at my grasp i attend to put all my effort into it

hope this helps someone try or feel motivated  to find there own dream job.

HOPE EVERYONE KNOWS THEY'RE FREE TO COMMENT / PUT THERE OPINION ON MY BLOG <3

FOR THE HIGHLY CREATIVE WILL UNDERSTAND

THE.HIGHLY.CREATIVE

The joys of enjoying the green for me anyway, is the fact  that it is my moment of relaxing slowing down the mind and the over analyzing i do everyday of my life ...

I enjoy the moment,i enjoy my day i see all the good and everything seems less dramatic.

I stay in the present like i have explained it allows you to stay at peace.

so when i intake the green its helping me stay at peace and reminds me to stay that way..

it kills my anxiety allows me to see all the possibilities of everything good as well,

i think while under the influence i have came up with the most interesting conversations, yes i know you might think it must be stoner idiotic talk? no its not! it real issues its real thoughts i feel at ease to bring up

i admit this kind of openness at times does depend who i am with and if that person is on the same page,

but then again this is a good example that some THC lovers are smart and other not so much but we're are not all in one category its like stereotyping!

also not always are you lazy kinda depends what batch you get , 

everyone has there moments of being slow has nothing to do with

 the green affecting and making you that way in my opinion !

just like any other drug medicated or not its not for everyone but in this case i am self medicating for anxiety 

and i don't think it does me any harm and i don't ever put it before anything important

 like work ,family, friends etc..

i would suggest now that i am a little bit older that after a long time of smoking of course side affects can occur because your smoking it! And i know that so now i am mostly trying to intake in tea highly effective give it try if smoking it is a bother (;

HOW THIS SAYING HELPS ME STAYING POSITIVE

so this is a little explanation on how this one saying has helped me view things a little different

“ If you are depressed you are living in the past. 

If you are anxious you are living in the future. 

If you are at peace you are living in the present. ”

When i was overwhelmingly 

depressed not wanting to go to work,staying home,trying to avoid everyone!this line here makes me realize 

i was depressed cause i was just over thinking everything in the past! depressed about things i could do nothing about now, I let the past haunt me over and over again i couldn't let go so of course i kept feeling horrible and alone and unappreciative 

At the points where i would be obsessing or continuously worried about how i couldn't do this or 

how i am never going to find anyone or boys are all the same

 or crying about anything that hasn't even happened yet

so i was being anxious about certain things which makes no sense if they haven't happened yet 

At this point I am being appreciative i am being positive i am not dwelling on the past or the future

i am enjoy today, i am enjoying the good in my life.

I am finally at peace and not being angry at what didn't work out or what hasn't happened for me yet.

Being positive is a daily task it isn't easy, but when i start to get negative i just read this quote and think about the truth in it and the simple fact of just living in the present to be at peace<3 

RANT 2 (WHEN LOVING SOMEONE IS A PAIN )

That moment when  Loving Someone is a shocking pain...

when your little you don't expect anything like it.

I was expecting some movie love, the love that is all good and no bad...

I wasn't prepared for such a disappointment or maybe i caused it myself ? 

The reason i get so confused with this topic is because i know i chose the person i love? 

and i knew exactly how they were but i still went ahead and invested my time. 

why? why do so many people do this..

maybe its something every person has to experience 

to appreciate when something good comes along.

Not going to lie my heartbreak lasted a while i think the reason i was so stuck on the person is because at the time i couldn't understand how if i loved them how could that love ever really stop if its real?

So me being stubborn i refused to give up or let go i guess i am loyal in that sense,

but i realize now that why put so much effort into someone that doesn't see me the same or equal at least it took like 2 yrs to finally get that -____-

So if i had to sum up advice from this i would say be wise on who you decide to love...

and make sure that they treat you the same way you treat them if not its probably going to cause you some pain at some point be wise.

Enjoy the memories and just be positive in any outcome of things cause it doesn't help dwelling, it'll take a while but when you get to see how i see you'll understand

stay positive.

RANT 1 ( lets start with me )

My name is Ashley i am 20 years old , my zodiac sing is VIRGO>> yours!
just kidding ... but i do like to look up my horoscope time to time i am into things like that.
currently i am going through life changes where i am constantly freaking out in my mind 
because its terrifying how fast life is passing me by and i still haven't made any secure decisions, but at this age i plan to change all that!

likes MUSIC SOCIAL-NETWORKS = INSTAGRAM, TWITTER etc. PHOTOGRAPHY 
anything with art really and anything to do with my cell phone being able to access it fast.
oh and of course time to time letting lose with some of that thehighlycreative love.

Let me tell you little about my past was a typical teen goo-die good when young Jr high came took advantage of parents not being around and went down a fast hill i mean it was fun some part of the fall but once i hit the bottom it hurt! and highschool was a pain in my ass reason of course like any typical girl story boy broke my heart </3 and felt like i couldn't go on but realistically i didn't want to go on yes... i am dramatic !

 In high school i did a lot more of trying to figure myself out which means i experimented with a lot of drugs not hardcore in my opinion just you know that candy like and out of mind experience ones you get into when EDM music is pounding in the background. it was fun not going to lie...

But i could have totally used my time for something better i do admit, lessons you have to experience to learn. After all that its been up and down fun times, depressing times and just plain boring days...

just like anyone else, so maybe we all are the same and il read your blogs and you'll read mine.

hope some of my rants will help some or be entertaining this is just day one with info about me(: